times, seasons and yellowkris10

On Tuesday, one of my dear friends, Kristen Kennedy, returned with honor from the Bulgaria Sofia Mission. I feel bad that I really didn't write her that much. Okay, pathetically it was only about 3 times, MAYBE, during the whole 18 months. However, I eagerly read her weekly email and was grateful for the little extra boost it gave me during the week. Now she is back in the states (Oregon, not Utah, but hey) and I am thrilled that she is just that much closer.

She has always been a strength and a good example to me. She has always been forgiving when I've stupidly been a jerk. I jokingly told her before she left that I would "wait for her", meaning I wouldn't get married until she got back. She kindly chastized me for saying such things and I good-naturedly took it in stride as I knew she said it with love. Anyway, a lot has happened in 18 months. Some of it good, some of it bad. Much personal growth has resulted.

I didn't "wait for her". I didn't get any closer to getting married either. It wasn't my faux promise that subconsciously stigmatized me. However, I did grow a lot and discovered that I still need to make changes in my life (that will stick with me) before I am ready to be in a close relationship. Prejudices to overcome, pride to swallow, making more reasonable expectations of others, rolling with the punches better and learning to appreciate myself for who I am and what I am able to do. Until then, I was (and still am somewhat) fighting against myself.

Luckily I had a strong base to start from. Kristen taught me more about myself in the year we were roommates. It is from there that I've been able to build upon who I am and understand myself more. I have been more successful and happy because of the influence she is in my life. When I grow up, I hope I can be like her.

Love ya Kristen!!!