Ghosts of Christmases Past

(retro post from December 2016)
Originally, this post was going to be titled "Why I Hate Christmas" but there's just too much hate on the internet these days and there's way too high of a probability that another entity has used a similar click bait title on their site. It also didn't properly describe how I was feeling or what I wanted to talk about. I was raised in a very loving, Christian home. My parents were parents to those who didn't have the best family lives. I didn't realize how much I took for granted until Thanksgiving break when we had a surprise visit by a long time family friend, E. He was in town and had gone for a drive and ended up coming straight to our house. He had been good friends with my brother and our moms had been very good friends for many years until their family moved away a couple of years ago. Anyway, E's parents were going through a pretty messy divorce and he flew out to Utah to support his mom during this difficult time (E's married and has 2 little ones). We were headed out the door before he came but waited for a bit while he visited with us. As we walked him out to the front door, I could feel how deeply E had needed this visit. The one place where he could feel safe and that everything was okay before he plunged back into the difficult issue of his parents' divorce. It would be finalized around Christmas time. Yeah, that's a GREAT memory to re-live every year. E reflected on that and dejectedly uttered, "I HATE Christmas." Three words to describe all the feelings that one feels when their family is being torn apart. 

In spite of that really sad moment, my brain starting thinking about how certain homes and families can become safe spaces. I can't take such things for granted because my family's home is one of them. While we are far from perfect, we are a safe space. Over the years, there have been a handful of other people's children who have shown up on our doorstep seeking sanctuary. Some during the day, others in the dead of night. So my hope is that my own home will be a safe place and sanctuary to myself and others. I think that's a good place to start.